Let’s just say 2017 was a rough year
If you’re a mom like me, there have been times when you’ve felt like the worst mom in the world. Whether that’s from you judging yourself, or someone else mom-shaming you, I’m here to tell you we’ve been there (or will be there someday) and its okay to mess up. So, if you need to feel better about yourself as a mom, here’s a look at a few of the not-so-great moments I had this year as a first-time mom.
The close call at Target
My daughter was born in February this year, and when she was six weeks old, I went to target with her to get this dorky collectible figure I had been waiting to come out. I was waiting in line for about half an hour when Ezra got hungry, and I needed to feed her. I took her out of her car seat, fed her, and then laid her back down in the car seat when she had finished. When it was time for us to stand up and check out for the collectible, I had forgotten I never buckled her back in. People were rushing and getting in front of me because I had to pick up my daughter’s car seat and was being slow. Well I quickly grabbed her car seat and as I picked it up I watched my six-week-old, slowly start to fall forward out of her car seat. I laid the car seat back down so quickly it made a loud noise as I tried to grab her and make sure she didn’t fall out. Luckily, she did not fall out of her car seat, but the 20 plus people there turned quickly to see my mishap, and I was so embarrassed. I quietly got to the end of the line so I could avoid seeing people’s judging faces. So even though Ezra was fine, I felt like a horrible mom for almost dropping my baby in front of a bunch of strangers.
Where did that wall come from??
When Ezra was about 2 or 3 months old, I had gotten up with her in the middle of the night and realized she needed a diaper change. I walked to her room to grab a diaper (I was out in my room where she was sleeping) and couldn’t see a thing so I needed to turn on her light. Ezra was just starting to hold her head up so I was juggling her in one arm, trying to support her as I reached for the light switch. I turned on the light, and poor Ezra was so unprepared for the sudden burst of light, she threw herself back and smacked her head on the wall I was standing next to. She instantly burst into tears, screaming and crying, as I tried soothing her without bursting into tears myself. After I had gotten her a bottle and calmed her down, I checked the back of her head for a bump about 30 times. I laid her back down in her bassinet, and then just laid in bed thinking about what a horrible mom I am. I woke up the next day and realized it was a small mistake and that Ezra would be okay, but I was still probably the worst mom of 2017.
The car seat cover made me do it!
This is one of those, “Wow, that could have been horrible” moments that I learned from but didn’t have to learn the hard way. As a new mom, I had to get out the house sometimes so that I wouldn’t go insane. When Ezra was still about 3 months old, I would have a cover over her car seat so she could sleep and keep the sun out of her eyes. I had gone to the mall one day, walked around with Ezra, took her out to feed her, pretty normal day. Well, when I had taken Ezra out to feed, and put her back, I didn’t buckle her back in right away in case I needed to take her out again. As I was leaving to go home, Ezra was sleeping with her car seat cover closed, and I loaded her up to drive home. When I got home and went to take her out of the car seat, I realized she was completely unbuckled, because I forgot to buckle her back in after feeding her. I was so horrified with myself, and felt so thankful that I didn’t get into an accident. But just thinking about what could have happened, I felt like the literal worst parent ever.
‘Bow right to the face
When Ezra was almost five months old, her and I traveled back home for my nephew’s first birthday. One day while I was home, my 7 year old niece had a cheerleading performance that we all went to see. We had to sit in bleachers and since we got there late, the front row was taken, forcing me to carry Ezra in her car seat up a metal flight of stairs. I was a little frustrated at that point. As I was walking up the stairs to find a seat, her car seat swung just the wrong way, and I elbowed her right in the face. She started screaming, and it felt like every face in the stands was staring at me. I found a seat quickly and tried soothing her but she just kept screaming. I thought I might have seriously hurt her. I got a bottle ready and tried to sooth her with that. Thankfully, she wanted the bottle and calmed down and everything was fine. Except I was still so overwhelmed with embarrassment I was holding back tears through the whole performance. Luckily, Ezra was perfectly fine, no black eye! And I didn’t die from embarrassment as the worst mom of the year.
She’s quicker than she looks!
Ezra is now 10 months old, and I’m still no Mom of the Year. She is crawling with the speed of light, and getting into everything she can. One morning, my husband and I were having a lazy start and hanging out with Ezra in bed. This meant constantly chasing her as she tried to crawl off the edge, her not realizing she would fall. I was standing next to our bed as we were about to get our day started, and I put Ezra down on the comforter. I noticed a wad of hair stuck to her leg, and my first thought was, “I need to grab that now, before it ends up in her mouth.” Well as I went to grab it, Ezra darted off the side of the bed, and before I could catch her, she face-planted right on the floor. It wasn’t a far fall, and I’m pretty sure it scared her more than anything, but she cried so hard at first, I felt horrible. I instantly picked her up and was telling her how sorry I was, and as soon as I held her she was fine. But I felt horrible, and thought I would never forgive myself for letting her fall.
But time goes on, Ezra is fine, and I’m on to the next bad mom moment. So this is for all the moms who feel like they are terrible sometimes. You are probably doing a lot better than you think, and you shouldn’t be so hard on yourself. Never let ANYONE make you feel like you’re not an awesome mom.